What IS Pumpkin Spice, anyway?
I had a moment of great joy the other day with the wonderful Brown Truck of Happiness delivered my order from CoffeeGiant.com. I had stumbled upon the fact that Green Mountain Coffee’s limited edition Pumpkin Spice coffee was now available, so I purchased as much as I could without attracting the attention of the Food and Drug Administration. (I have to think that the hoarding of coffee falls under some kind of controlled substance laws, or otherwise suggests a person in need of pharmaceutical intervention.)
At any rate, Pumpkin Spice time. Hooray! A couple of weeks back, I recall seeing on Twitter a flurry of tweets celebrating the return of some kind of autumn-y spice coffee in their local Starbucks stores, but to be honest I recall thinking, “Wow. All these people descending on Starbucks for a cup of coffee. How cute.” And then I opened my Seasonal Coffee Sampler that arrived with a recent “regular” coffee delivery and gave ol’ Pumpkin Spice a try. And now I understand.
I have no idea if what I’m ingesting by the liter is the same as what Starbucks is hawking, and I don’t care. I’ve got Pumpkin Spice in my kitchen, 24/7. I don’t need to wrestle with faux-Italian or crazy descriptive sizing words. (Is a Tall actually small? A Grande is medium? Venti? Doesn’t that mean 20? And if they’re referring to 20, why would that be the biggest? Bring on the “Treinta e sei,” or “Cinquenta e quattro.” Or something.)
I ordered five 24-packs of Pumpkin Spice K-cups. I think that’s nearly a gross — you may think it’s gross, but it’s not — and so let me now take this time to officially apologize to my sister-in-law: She hoarded some kind of coconut coffee flavor at the start of summer, much to my amusement: “How cute. She’s hoarding coffee.” Sue, sorry sistah. You were right. I get it. If you want, you can come over for a Pumpkin Spice coffee while supplies last. I’ll even make it an Ottenta. Or Cento. Your call.
I figure the Pumpkin Spice will last me until end of October or so (if my daughters would please stop drinking it, ahem) — and then it will be on to other seasonal varieties. I’m not holding out much hope for anything better than Pumpkin Spice, however. “Santa’s Blend” gives me pause. Not sure I need the jolly ol’ elf in the coffee biz — he can’t get the kids’ presents under the tree in the correct order. How’s he going to select premium beans?